tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1930772489313890725.post9059239014335257226..comments2013-10-21T00:14:13.911+01:00Comments on Feminist Cupcakes: Being Kind To Myself.Feminist Cupcakeshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05208864138144789986noreply@blogger.comBlogger3125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1930772489313890725.post-22728054487914819782013-02-19T15:11:23.808+00:002013-02-19T15:11:23.808+00:00I do understand about your parents. My childhood ...I do understand about your parents. My childhood scars come from a lot of good intentions too. Unfortunately, issues that our parents didn't work through themselves to resolve tend to get passed along to the children. <br /><br />Please know that this, while it sounds complimentary, is not intended to be a compliment. It is truth, and I hope that you'll be helped by it. (((HUGS)))caseyoconnellhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03442031229181653672noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1930772489313890725.post-29470820274250961502013-02-14T20:59:38.537+00:002013-02-14T20:59:38.537+00:00Thank you for this, it's a lovely comment to g...Thank you for this, it's a lovely comment to get. I don't have many readers, but I was scared of the reaction I might get from this; thankfully it's been overwhelmingly positive.<br /><br />I probably didn't make it clear enough in my post, but I'm certain that whatever my parents said or did was only ever done out of love. I'm sure they didn't mean to make me feel the way they did, but unfortunately intent isn't magic and doesn't wipe out any of the pain.<br /><br />Thank you again for this comment. It really reinforces that I was right to publish this, and it's an incredible compliment.<br />Feminist Cupcakeshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05208864138144789986noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1930772489313890725.post-91810847536186655632013-02-14T15:02:17.165+00:002013-02-14T15:02:17.165+00:00Oh honey, you're making me tear up here. List...Oh honey, you're making me tear up here. Listen to me: you did not deserve the treatment you received from your family and other trusted adults (your doctor, etc.). You did nothing wrong, and you still ended up being hurt, belittled and punished. I wish that I could go give the child you were a big hug and some protection from that. It burns me up thinking about this happening to kids. You did not deserve that: you were a victim. Please keep repeating that to yourself--you did not deserve that.<br /><br />Obviously, you don't deserve it now, either. But I specifically mention it from the childhood aspect because that's where this self-worth issue has its roots. I have an emotional abuse issue in my childhood too, and it helps me to think about who I was as that child and think about how brave she actually was. Rather than quit trying and commit suicide, or turn to hurting other people, that little girl/teenager <em>kept on going</em>. Step back for a moment and think of yourself in that context. Look at that little girl's strength and marvel at her! She did it--she survived and became you, and she's a goddamned hero. A lot of people couldn't have done what she/you did, BUT YOU DID. Be so, so proud of yourself. Do you hear me? I am not blowing smoke--you did it. Build on that, and keep growing. <br /><br />I'm proud of you. Thank you for writing this post. It is brave and true and good, and so are you.caseyoconnellhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03442031229181653672noreply@blogger.com